Welcome back to those who have been here before and hello to those that may be here for the first time. Things in my world have been moving steadily forward since I last wrote a blog.
The most notable update is that “My Mental Health Story” has finally found its way onto Amazon and Barnes and Noble websites for pre-order! The book cover will be updated on those sites to the latest version shortly. The book is with the publishers and being converted into final proof format for publication. Seeing my first ever book finally out where the real world can view it is hard to even fathom at the moment. It is a dream come true for me and definitely a “bucket list” item. It gives me a sense of accomplishment but also encourages me to continue with the next books. I am truthfully enjoying my newfound passion for writing.
For those interested, I have expanded my “Mental Health Resources” tab and created new content under the “Give” tab. The resources listed are to the best of my knowledge and experience reasonable places or organizations for the delivery of mental health help. The charitable businesses and organizations listed are similarly to the best of my knowledge worthy of financial and/or volunteering donations. I hope that both tabs can be helpful.
There have been notable mistakes I have made along the way during this author journey, but they just reenforce that I am the “imperfect human” I have previously described. As always, the important piece is the learning part that comes with new experiences and unforeseen mistakes. So many famous individuals and famous quotations have eloquently described the concept of learning from one’s mistakes, and for good reason. I personally like what Frank Herbert wrote in his famous “Dune” novel, that “Without new experiences, something inside of us sleeps. The sleeper must awaken.” If I can help guide anyone considering writing a book, add a question and I can certainly do my best to provide assistance.
I now am turning my attention to making Book 2 “The Path Uncertain” a reality. This is the book that will cover the most significant parts of my mental health journey, and I suspect will be in many difficult to write but with the most personal meaning. It will be my opportunity to truly share the deep dark places where my mind found nothing but uncertainty and at times true hopelessness. Sharing it will truly be putting myself out in front of the world to see, which is on the one hand frightening and on the other hand rewarding as the cathartic experience I anticipate it to be. As I conclude my current daily journals it will be a true situation of “we shall see…”
My current mental health status has shown slow but steady improvement as I see it. My Ativan dose slowly decreases and my speech and mood seem to hold steady. The positive experiences staying with my parents and following my treatment and therapy plans, combined with a sense of increasing confidence, are making the steady progress of healing continue. I don’t think I will ever be “cured” of mental health concerns anymore than I believe that there is any person without some underlying mental health issues. It many ways I feel better knowing my issues and now understanding methods of coping.
As for my Achilles, there is similar slow and steady progress. My orthopedist noted in my four month post operative follow up appointment yesterday that he considers me “ahead of schedule”. I will likely never regain full strength in that leg but I am now more comfortably walking. No more boot for me which is a not so subtle improvement – I feel more “normal” walking around and I am able to drive a car once more. It was the beginning of April last I could say that! You don’t realize how limiting not being able to drive a car is until it happens to you. The key now is consistent steady physical therapy and the exercises they have taught me. One leg exercises including balancing, the use of tension bands, and still “playing with my marbles” are the mainstays of my strength and coordination building. My neighborhood “walks” have become a significant part of my day-to-day existence. Originally, I was in my boot and known as the “boot man” throughout the neighborhood. This earned me significant attention and allowed me to meet many new people. Walking without the boot now is less noticeable but by now I have made enough acquaintances that I am seemingly always stopping to talk to someone. Walks have become a combined way for me to get physical improvement and allowed me to “test” my speech skills meeting and interacting with new people.
Overall, I would say that my life continues on a positive trend. I currently maintain a daily journal of my “plan of the day” followed by a recording of the actual events of each day. I have been doing this since roughly May, becoming more consistent and detailed over time. It is an interesting exercise to make a best laid “plan” for the next day and then to see what actually occurs. Every day offers unique unforeseen twists and turns just as life should. This reality keeps all of us constantly “on our toes”, teaches us adaptability, and shapes who we are. Responsibly we plan for the things we need and want and then make the best out of the course of events as they unfold. My current journaling is the basis for my fourth book, which in my mind is steadily forming but lacks much other than the raw journal content. It will be another stimulating project I anticipate.
I again hope that those visiting my website will find at least one thing of interest or help. I also hope that those reading this will take an interest in my books and through the course of reading them understand my reality. With understanding I wish that my story is of benefit to my readers in at least a small way, and further pray that I am an example of how to survive struggles and come out of the tunnel to find a new and perhaps better life.
As always, please do add appropriate questions or comments as you see fit. I would enjoy trying to answer what questions I can, and am open to all reasonable feedback.
